Praise the Lord!

I don't have to go to my Communications Law class today! The professor is ill! Yay!

I'm done at noon... how exciting is that?!

What a day...

I feel like I've been hit my emotional and physical bricks. My body is hurting and my heart, grieving.

I'm exhausted, to say the least.

I've been trying to do homework, but my brain has yet to focus well. I've been working on my law reading, which is interesting, but it's just a lot. I have my first exam in that class a week from Monday and I'm terrified. Guess who's going to be studying next week? Oh... that would be me. :)

I have a lot of drugs in my system right now. If I didn't have so much to do and I didn't need to focus, it would be even better, I'm sure.

I went to class today, though, even when my head and body so loudly said, "No!" I pulled my butt out of bed at 7:25 to make my 8am class. Take that! ;)

I have decided to go home on Saturday. Just for the night and to do some laundry (and homework), but it'll be good to be someplace different for a while. I think we all need a change of scenery at this point.

Candace and I signed up to stay in the same room again next year... it's wonderful to have stability and be blessed with a wonderful roommate all at the same time. It's one of the few peaceful things I have right now.

Back to the law textbook... oh joy! 'Night.

Mood: Studious Listening to: Shane and Shane, Upstairs Reading: The transition from the bad tendecy doctrine to the clear and present danger test (Communications Law)

One sleepless night later...

...a headache, some Tylenol and Sudaphed, three classes, lunch, a nap, a long talk with the girls, and a shower, I have finally made it to this point. My body is barely functioning and I have stuff to do.

Just be praying. We need prayer. A lot of it. And peace. That would be nice, too.

It's such a beautiful day, too...

Mood: Utterly Exhausted Listening To: Adam Watts, The Noise Inside Reading: Nothing

"Shut your eyes. Jump. Take this beautiful fall."

Adam Watts, The Noise Inside

I must say... I love this album. It's such a diverse, colorful, thoughtful album. It's also the reason I'm still awake. Going to bed early is like saying I won't get to sleep. Darn Murphy. Anyway... I was listening to my iPod and went to listen to one of his songs and it made my brain think too much, so here I am. It's so poetic. There's one song that I want to be played at my wedding, but that's a different story altogether. So much for sleep, huh? Anyway, I had a long day... classes this morning and one this afternoon. I spent the rest of my time trying to get my work done for my Media Effects class and trying to figure out if I'm going home this weekend or not. I'm still not sure. I actually had energy, though, which is the first time in a long time that I haven't felt like a shell of a person. The opening words of the song, "I Will Fear Not" keep ringing through my head, "I could fall apart before I start. In the grip of doubt, I need You, Lord. Will You carry me? Take hold of me when I can't see an open door?"

I've been struggling a lot lately and I feel so strangely incomplete.

Our senior pastor, Tom, came and talked at our college group tonight about free will and predestination, which was so good; he knows Scripture so well that it was cool just to hear him talk, you know?

It was good to see people tonight at college group and at dinner... I feel like I am so isolated because of my insane schedule. Next semester will be so much better, since I'll be down to four classes, instead of six. I miss seing people and talking to them and just hanging out with them. I just pray that God will "turn what was fear into love" regarding my doubts and insecurities. He loves me enough to change me, and I look forward to the day when these fears disappear.

'Night.

Current Mood: Sleepy Listening to: Adam Watts, The Noise Inside Reading: Nothing.

It's 42 degrees outside...

... and it had to be even colder in my classes this morning. I sat through all of my classes, huddled in my winter coat and shivering. Why does it have to be so cold?! Anyway, my classes were good. We watched a movie about nonverbal gestures in my Sociology class, which consisted of how to flip people off in several different countries (!), and we watched a whole bunch of clips from random stuff in my Media Effects class because we were looking at the Payne Fund Studies on movie effects in children. Fun stuff, actually, but I am a nerd, so... In trying to warm up, I'm going to spend some time digging into my Bible and then doing homework until my lab tonight. My Communications Law prof assigned nine chapters of reading for last week alone! I'm still trying to catch up... that's like two full weeks' worth of reading for all of my classes. Grr... I'm going to look into coming up with a skin for this thing that is my own, so... maybe that'll happen someday. Have a good one.

Current Mood: Cold Listening to: Mute Math, Reset EP Reading: Communications Law