I had a wonderful time in Vail, fellowshiping with MountainView people and getting to spend time with Chris. It was great to get away, to do something different, to work on some things that I was wanting to get around to.
One of those things was an attempt at honesty. I wrote my parents a letter that detailed some things from my past that I felt were especially relevant to where I am currently. I prayed about this for the past year, asking God to show me the right time and what needed to be told.
So, I wrote my letter in Vail (I had been thinking it out for weeks). It was a long letter. I put a lot of thought and prayer into the words that I chose.
When I left for school, I left the finished letter with my parents.
My mom's reaction surprised me. She was supportive of where I am, almost completely writing off my past experiences. She understood things that I was afraid she wouldn't understand.
My dad's reaction, however, was also a surprise. I felt that every action I took was misunderstood.
And it hurts to know that there has come a time when I don't completely agree with my dad. It's a relationship I have always treasured (and I will continue to do so).
But it's all about God's timing. Despite advice and warnings, it's okay to do things differently once in a while. Every person is going to be different. Replication is not always the best thing and it can, in the end, even lead to failure.
I haven't lived long enough to say that I know all that I'm talking about. I am inexperienced and foolish and incredibly naive - but can't I be free to make my own mistakes?
When someone tells you that you need to be safe before you can take a risk, isn't that somewhat oxymoronic? Isn't that defeating the purpose? I'm trying to work it through my head, and it's not working its way through - no matter how much I wrestle with it.
People grow up. Things change. We're not always going to do what others want us to.
But we answer to our Father and Him alone... May that be all the motivation for risk we ever need.
Mood: Bored Listening to: Acceptance, Phantoms
Reading: Stuff for Media Ethics
"Those that cling to worthless idols forfeit the grace that could be theirs." [[Jonah 2:8]]
1 comment:
I'll talk to you more when I call you up later this week but I am really glad you did that. I did that with Mom and Dad too and although not incredibly reactionary as your did I am glad to know that honesty was spoken. I think honesty and honesty that we are being honest is one of the hardest things to grab ahold of and actually do.
Thanks for doing that though for yourself as well as mom and dad and about the whole different thing. We are not called to be carbon copies of our parents we are to strive only after Christ and become who he was and will always be.
As for things slowing down if you are open and Christ gives you the strength to deal with which you will do things will not slow down they will infact speed up. Get ready for what is coming prepare your heart and mind God is moving in such magnificent and glorious ways and although he does all the work we are the workers. However I like being a worker a busy bee.
Hope school is well and Chris is good too. I wish I had more time for prayer on the subject but I am wrapped up in so many things it uterly astounds me I find strength to make it through each day. Again I will talk to you later. Love you so immensly.
JG
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